Three men in lifeboat.
No food 'cept SPAM. Hour later:
Two men in lifeboat.
--Chris Fishel, ctf2m@virginia.edu

Autoerotic!
Open can, insert member:
Wham, bam, thank you SPAM!
--Jon Howell and Liam Friedland, jhowell@us.oracle.com and lfriedla@us.oracle.com

Crowds of refugees,
Starving. UN airdrops SPAM.
Muslims flee from planes.
--Martin Booda, booda@datasync.com

Old man seeks doctor:
"I eat SPAM daily," he says
ANGIOPLASTY
--Christopher James Hume (With unauthorized change in wording from "decries" to "says.")

Fed my dog warm SPAM.
Pissed in shoes. Ate my wallet.
Bitter little fuck.
--Jonathan Black, damaginc@siu.edu

SPAM glistens pinkly;
Cat taps it with wary paw
To see if it's dead.
--Anonymous

Descartes on pig parts
Says: "I'm pink, therefore I'm SPAM"
Deep philosophy
--Chris Fishel, ctf2m@virginia.edu

Does SPAM contain tongues?
When you eat it, does it taste
you as you taste it?
--Chris Fishel, ctf2m@virginia.edu

SPAM is not a gift.
When you eat, just remember:
It's only a loan.
--Martin Booda, booda@datasync.com

Made a SPAM puppet
To entertain my doggie
Need a new hand now
--Tom Elliott, Tosh@Werple.mira.net.au

Leaning to kiss her,
Smelling her breath, I thought of
Love and luncheon loaf.
--Rex Jones, rex@uis.msstate.edu

There are worse things than
A SPAM-limited diet.
Like coprophagy.
--Martin Booda, booda@datasync.com

I put my shoes on
But remembered far too late
My secret SPAM stash
--Tom Elliott, Tosh@Werple.mira.net.au

I hear the SPAM ball
It bounces, porqua, porqua
A haiku of spring
--B. Tallen

Outdoor church potluck.
SPAM casserole steams in sun.
Flies choose the tuna.
--jpollard@rdc.noaa.gov

Dole, Gramm, and Gingrich.
Pink, porcine, processed, packaged.
Political SPAM.
--Spamonymous

SPAM frying in lard
The whir of the kitchen fan
Summer of my youth
--Linda

acidic heartburn
a boat disappears in mist
traces of old SPAM
--jingu, rbender@sas.upenn.edu

Split the SPAM atom
Enormous pink mushroom cloud
World covered in pork
--Tom Elliott, Tosh@Werple.mira.net.au

Sunset placid pond
where campers often linger--
rusted can of SPAM
--Dr. S. Garrigues, steve@bh.kyungpook.ac.kr

Bright lights and cruel cops
grill the suspect pork product.
It doesn't confess.
--WhaarfRat@aol.com

Scott O'Grady packed
SPAM in his survival kit,
lived on bugs for days.
--Rex Jones, rex@uis.msstate.edu

Senator Exon
Downloads SPAM GIFs from archive,
Soils the Senate floor.
--Martin Booda, booda@datasync.com

brasiliana
amorphously glistening
the sound of Spam Getz
--Screamin' Phil Erickson, pje@hyperion.haystack.edu

I took SPAM to work
They fired me--so be warned
It's not meant as clothes
--Tom Elliott, Tosh@Werple.mira.net.au

Hold tight, street person!
Wise-ass crow on the dumpster
is eyeing your SPAM.
--Paul W. Lewis, pp001342@interramp.com

Worse than eating SPAM?
Watching your father-in-law
eat a trout head. (Crunch.)
--Matt Ragozzino, mwr@teleport.com

Zen Buddhist SPAM quest:
"What are the ingredients?"
What do you desire?
--Alex Dunne, dunne_alex@jpmorgan.com

Bum with hole in shoe
Finds Elmer's and SPAM. Eats glue,
patches hole with SPAM.
--Chris Fishel, ctf2m@virginia.edu

Driving with Ute friends.
Miles of silence pass before,
"Price of SPAM is up."
--Anonymous

Downtown park in spring
with SPAM-pink cherry blossoms
neon haze of night
--Dr. S. Garrigues, steve@bh.kyungpook.ac.kr

new roommate arrives
cooks sunday morning fried SPAM
goodbye new roommate
--Screamin' Phil Erickson, pje@hyperion.haystack.edu

The blue can is square
Why not a circular can?
Too much like dog food
--Anonymous

Contents

May 2001